Saturday, February 6, 2010

Simon's Stinky Shirt & Lightning Laundry Lady

Sometimes I have really lame daydreams.

Yesterday while folding laundry, I somehow got thinking about American Idol, that dumb show that I watch once in a while even though it's dumb (I die laughing at the people who can't sing and then get mad that Simon and his buddies are so rude).
And then I started thinking about the show America's Got Talent...and an idea popped into my head!
What if I went on for the talent of FOLDING LAUNDRY?!
And that's not it! I'd fold it superfast, like some lightning speed woman! And I'd be good-humored about it, too.

"So, Q-...Quat? Quit? Kuwait? You're folding laundry, huh?"

"YES! I am!"

"Alriiiight...."

BAM! Snap the shirt with a fist punch and it magically slaps in half, then I twist it around my wrist and slam it flat. TADA! Fast like a bolt. A lightning bolt. All the while smiling. "And now an INSIDE-OUT shirt!" Audience gasps. Snap-snap, twirl, slam, tada! And after more impressive karate-chop moves with pants and socks and underwear, the whole load of laundry is done in seconds, right before their eyes.

Does Simon fold his own laundry? He always wears the same white shirt...ew...
"Well, I guess that was impressive, but I can't really imagine you coming up with a better act for the next show..."

*I give a good-humored laugh, because Simon can't be snarky to ME*
"Right, what's next? Towels? Bedsheets?! Hah! No, I came onto this show to show the world of laundry-folding moms that it can be done quickly and easily--no longer the bane of your existence! I will teach lessons for a very affordable fee."

And with that, I'd become the richest woman in the world (and all by being a smart mom--AWESOME)!

By the time the daydream had unfolded, my laundry was folded. Oh well. I can pretend. (I did try those amazing moves...they look much cooler in my head).

3 comments:

  1. Oh Q, I LOVE YOU! This made me laugh and want to hug you and hang out with you (doing laundry, of course). :)

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  2. Haaaaaaa!! :) :) I am so imagining you doing this right now. I reckon Simon would try to employ you as his lightning laundry lady ;) Think of the millions you could earn. I think my talent would be chocolate related.

    I didn't realise you had America's Got Talent. We've had Britain's got talent for a while and I guess next year Simon is taking our show X factor to the US too. America always steal our programmes!!! :P

    Your daydreams are not lame!!

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  3. If only folding my laundry was such fun!

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