Okay, guess what. I think I'm a tad depressed (don't be alarmed, though, haha!). And I think it's a mom thing. And a vacation thing.
I don't work outside the home, so I'm already with the kids a lot. Then vacation time hits, and...I'm with the kids a lot! Haha... so why is it vacation? Oh, just kidding. But the difference for me, no matter where we are, is that vacation means I get more time with Michael. That's it. That is pretty much the only real change.
I'm not ungrateful for the other changes, like when we're visiting family and we're away from our own home. There are other ways that vacation is nice, of course! I ADORE being with family, and it does give me some freedom from my kids.
Anyway, look at it like this. I love my kids. I love my home. But I am at home with my kids so much that I need some change.
I realized this month that I seriously miss running. Who would have thought! It happened somewhere along the way in my marathon training. Running now equals freedom to me. A very wonderfully private time for me.
And now there's snow on the ground. I wouldn't mind running in rain (in fact, I hoped so many times that it would rain during my months of marathon training...and it never once happened). But running in the snow is just not smart. Plus, my shoes couldn't handle it (and to be honest, I need new running shoes because a marathon can kill even the best sneakers).
It has all made me do some thinking, because depression is just stupid. And I know I'm not a sad person. How convenient that I'm taking action just when it's time to make some New Year's Resolutions, right?
Here's the deal, though. I'm sick of calling this stuff Resolutions. I'm looking at it a new way, finally. My aim this year is to create some good habits that I really need to have. Things that will help me to be a happy woman, a happy mom, and a happy wife.
I know making art restores my emotional health incredibly well.
I know exercising gives me really important time to myself.
I know I feel really good about myself when I cook and bake for the family.
I know I stress less when I'm organized with my budget and home.
I know I am happier when I take care of myself.
I know waking up early makes everything easier.
I know I love my church calling more when I prepare for each Sunday.
Therefore, these are the personal habits I would like to enforce:
- WAKE UP EARLY. And I mean early. Not just early enough to get a headstart. Early enough that I can have time for myself, blogging and reading scriptures and escaping to the gym before having to worry about getting breakfast started.
- DRAW/CREATE EVERY WEEK. Seriously! I still love trying to create something every month, but I'm "upgrading" this so that I will make myself draw (or make artwork--not a craft) every week.
- CREATE A WEEKLY MENU. Not a monthly or bimonthly one...that intimidates me a little too much still when I sit down to put it together. I'm not going to think about breakfasts except for all the Sunday mornings. A weekly menu of dinners. That's all.
- BUDGET MONTHLY. And keep up with the budget during the month.
- AIM TO WEAR MAKEUP EVERY DAY. That's a really big deal for me. By aiming that high, I'm more likely to get the other stuff done (shower, hair, etc.). Phew...this really is a big one. But I think it will be really, really good for me.
- TAKE SUNDAYS SERIOUSLY. I will use my Sundays to prepare for my calling, and I will make sure things are taken care of for visiting teaching.
- GO TO THE TEMPLE MONTHLY. Even if our schedule makes me have to go by myself. That would be better than not going!
- TALK TO A FAMILY MEMBER EVERY DAY. Not just text or email. Real talking-- a quick little phone call is good enough. I think that I really need this.
I'm tempted to make myself choose certain days for certain things. Monday=art, Thursday=temple, etc. But I actually think that's a bad idea. Because I've tried to do that before, and it drove me crazy. I'm kind of a booger about having "freedom" in my schedule-- and to be honest, I think that's a good thing! Not just because I have a couple kids who have no qualms about being cranky on busy days (know what I mean?). If I try and stick myself to rigid calendar, I'll feel overwhelmed, and I will rebel.
Sheesh, am I really only just learning this the day before I'm 25?
(And yes, for some reason that feels a bit old to me...mostly because I feel like 25 is happening sooner than I'm ready for it, not because the age itself is old).