I like to daydream, that's nothing new. But sometimes I daydream about what it would be like if I were stranded on a desert island. I should say deserted, because I like to stick variety in their sometimes and make it a wintry island. And sometimes the funnest part of all this is the really stupid details! So here's what I'd be like:
- REALLY REALLY hairy legs and armpits
- Blind...I would so miss my contact case and solution. Maybe even my contacts, if I were unfortunate enough to lose them on the way to being stranded. Hm. That's not a stupid detail.
- Really really tan, mmm. Yeah, if I were alone (or just with Michael...), I'd totally embrace nature and save my clothes so they'd be in nice condition for the day I'd get saved. Because seriously, who wants to be rescued with an atrocious farmer's tan?
- My hair? Forget awesome beach waves. After about three days, I'd look like those gross paintings of the English queens whose hair is plastered down on their scalps and combed so greasily that you can practically count each strand. Ew.
- STINKY. I do not sweat much. I'm not a stinky person. But if you take me away from a shower for an extended period of time, you regret it. At least I'd be a good bug repellent.
- Zitty. It's sad. I'd love to look glamorous for the rescuers...too bad.
- My breath? This is a new category of STINKY. And you know how your teeth feel after you eat a banana? Kind of feathery? Well my teeth would have their own peel.
- Dirty fingernails...and long toenails! EW!!!
- And just remember, no makeup...which does matter to me.
- No lotion! Aaaah! I hate the feeling of dried out skin!
- TOTALLY talking to my own "Wilson." Heck, I'd have a whole gang of them.
And Michael? He'd be black-tan plus a beard. His hair would get curlier. He'd stink, but he'd be pretty close to the same. Men have it easy.
It's not fair!!!